Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Back To School

Labor Day’s history. Summer, for all practical purposes, is over [sigh]. And so begins another school year, filled with cranky teachers, mean bullies and the horror of P.E. If only this were all just one big nightmare.

But wait, it is! We’re all adults here and save for the odd refrigeration-repair class or a refresher course at truck-driving school, our classroom days are done. Yippee! Let’s go out and celebrate our freedom at some of these great events.

Wanna New Drug? Go To The Symphony!
Huey Lewis & The News with the Dallas Symphony Orchestra
Tonight, 8:00 p.m.
We’re just waiting for Back in Time to relive memories of Michael J. Fox running around the 1950s in his Calvin Kleins. Good times, good times.

Tickets: $50 – $95
Meyerson Symphony Center
2301 Flora Street, Dallas
www.dallassymphony.com

Hot Enough For Ya?
Texas ZestFest 2008
Friday, September 5 – Sunday, September 7
OK, when we got the press release about this event, it claimed that it was a “XXX event that’s fun for the whole family”). Seriously. Images of clown porn in the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese immediately popped to mind, but after a little Nancy Drewin’, we discovered that “XXX” actually is a level of heat intensity of spicy peppers. (We like our version better). But if you like it hot, this is the event for you. Taste great, zesty foods or register for the Jalapeño Eating Contest if you’re feeling extra butch (or in the mood for a little self-punishment).

Tickets: $10
Will Rogers Memorial Center
Amon G. Carter Exhibit Hall
3401 West Lancaster Avenue, Fort Worth
www.zestfest2008.com

Sponsored Listing
Up, Up And A Gay
Gay Up Stand Up – An Evening of Straight Up Stand Up with Flair
Sunday, September 7, 8:00 p.m.
OK, we think the person who came up with the title for this event must’ve gotten paid by the word (or by the “UP”s). You had us at “Gay Up Stand Up.” Though the tagline is completely unnecessary, what is essential is your attendance at this fabulous event, filled with LOL and ROTFL moments from comedians Jason Dudey, Erin Foley, Paul J. Williams (Go, Edna Garrett!), and Shawn Pelofsky. Meanwhile, Hostess with the Moistest Cassie Nova will be on hand (and knees) to keep things rolling between sets.

Tickets: $20
Lakewood Theater
1825 Abrams Parkway, Dallas
(214) 821-7469
www.ticketmaster.com or www.lakewoodtheater.com

Lordy, Lordy. Look Who’s 140.
The Spectacular Senior Follies
Friday, September 5 – Sunday, September 7
It’s Golden Girls meets Ziegfeld Follies as a cast of over-55 performers (as in age, not quantity) takes the stage at the Eisemann Center in Richardson. This one-of-a-kind show features singers, dancers and showgirls (a.k.a. showgrannies). Proceeds benefit the senior arts communities, so not only are you getting a great night of entertainment, but you’re ensuring future productions the likes of which might include Cocoon, Murder She Wrote: The Musical or Naked Boys Singing.

Tickets: $25 – $60
Eisemann Center
2351 Performance Drive, Richardson
(972) 744-4650
www.seniorfollies.com

Get Down On All Fours
Canine Cool Drool
Sunday, September 7, 2:00 – 5:00 p.m.
Join AIDS Arms, Inc. and LifeBark for an afternoon of canine hijinks as the patios of the Old Sue Ellen’s (2:00 p.m.), the NEW Sue Ellen’s (3:00 p.m.) and S4 (4:00 p.m.) turn into a progressive party for your pooches. Enjoy several contests, win great prizes and take home a pack of giveaways, or just sit back and enjoy an afternoon of peeing on things and sniffing butts (dogs not required, but encouraged).

FREE
3903 Cedar Springs, 3014 Throckmorton and 3911 Cedar Springs (back entrance), Dallas
(214) 521-5191
www.lifewalk.org/CoolDrool.html

Sponsored Listing
Ahoy, (Table) Captain!
Black Tie Dinner Ticket Sales & Table Captain Happy Hour
Tuesday, Sept 9, 6:00 – 8:00 p.m.
The fancy folks at Black Tie Dinner are shaking things up for this year's event ticket sales. Gone are the days of showing up (hung over) in a brightly-lit hotel ballroom early Saturday morning. This time around, you can snag your table's tickets and get your drink on at their Ticket Sales & Table Captain Happy Hour. They're even throwing in appetizers and the promise that you need not be present the entire time, as long as you show up with your forms completed and full payment in hand. We're so there…

Bronx Restaurant & Bar
3835 Cedar Springs, Dallas
Be sure to visit the “Table Captain Headquarters” section of the Black Tie Dinner website for details, forms and other important info:
www.blacktie.org

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