Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Fathers, Sons, Holy Spirits

The holidays mean many things to many people. Love, charity, happiness, good will toward mankind. And all that jazz.

But it also means spending quality time with the fam – racist grandmothers yearning for The Golden Years, loud tweenie rugrats looping the Jonas Brothers for hours, the parental units questioning whether you’ve finally made a “special friend.”

Sheesh, you could use a drink.

This may be hard to swallow, but sometimes a box of Franzia just won’t do. And neither will sneaking MeeMaw’s cheap bourbon out of the plastic bottle and into the hip flask.

Allow us to offer some recommendations.

Let’s start with a fan favorite: Bailey’s Irish Cream with a hint of coffee. Karen Walker drank her Bailey’s with a splash of coffee, so why shouldn’t we? Enjoy over ice, blended, or directly form the bottle. Rich, creamy and boozy, just like Christmas should be.

We adore the Scottish, and not just because they wear skirts. We recommend the Singleton of Glendullan, a 12-year-old single malt Scotch whisky. If you’re lookin’ for a Zima, this ain’t it.

We could praise the smooth, balanced qualities of the whisky, but because we’re judgmental bitches at heart, we’ll simply say that the Singleton received a 92-point rating of Exceptional from the Beverage Testing Institute. Done and done.

Hoping to up your fancy quotient? Indulge in a bottle of Oban 18-Year-Old, a limited-edition single malt whisky from one of the oldest distilleries in Scotland. The 18-year-old boasts a fruity, smooth textured taste with a trace of saltiness and a drying, smoky finish.

Share these fine spirits with your friends and loved ones – maybe even your “special friend” – it’ll help you survive through the weekend, or at least make it less painful.

Bailey’s With A Hint Coffee: $19
Singleton, 12-year-old: $36
Oban 18-year-old: $150