Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Know Before You Show: January Theatre

Just like New Year’s dieters, this month Dallas theatre is swearing off the same old routine and resolving to bring something new to the stage. Gone are the tired productions of Showboat and Our Town, and ushered in are new works translated from the sixteen hundreds and lesser-known, light-hearted pieces.

It’s just the entertainment you need to go along with that slimming Beyoncé Maple Syrup Master Cleanser Diet. Just make sure you’re past the gassy stage of the detox before cramming yourself into a small, windowless audience with all the other patrons.

Viva La Diva
Broadway Our Way: Divas Awakening
Friday, January 9 – Sunday, January 18
For every boy who has ever dreamed of giggling like Glenda in Wicked or purring like Grizabella in Cats, this is your night. The annual fundraiser/variety show for Uptown Players gender bends an evening of Broadway classics into a variety show romp. Get ready sing out Louise, ‘cause everything’s coming up roses indeed!

Tickets: $40
Uptown Players at the KD Studio Theatre
2600 North Stemmons Freeway, Dallas
(214) 219-2718
www.uptownplayers.org

Tryst My Arm
Trysts In Toledo
Through Sunday, January 18
Long before Sister Mary Amnesia took to the stage in Nunsense, Sor Juana Inéz De La Cruz, a nun living in Mexico, was writing witty madcap comedies like Trysts in Toledo. Famed stage daddy Jac Alder provides the new English version for this story of mischief and mayhem amongst nobles and servants. Cue the Benny Hill chase music.

Tickets: $10 – $40
Theatre Three
2800 Routh Street, Dallas
(214) 871-3300
www.theatre3dallas.com

Maine Attraction
Almost, Maine
Opens January 16, BYOB Night January 22
Some say love, it is a river…others say love is a series of vignettes featuring about 20 kooky characters played by four actors in Almost, Maine. We’re prepared for more rom-com cuteness than a theatre full of newlyweds at a Sleepless In Seattle screening. Aren’t we sugar bear poopy-pants?

Tickets: $15 – $17
Theatre Arlington
305 West Maine Street, Arlington
(817) 275-7661
www.theatrearlington.org

Girls Gone Mild
A Feminine Ending
Opens Thursday, January 29
It’s time to prime the pump for Valentine’s Day and get the love juices flowing. Okay, perhaps that was too much of a visual. Rather, how about a nice romantic comedy about dreams deferred to warm the cockles of your heart or to pour salt in the already bitter wounds of that fresh breakup. Whichever.

Tickets: $20 – $25
WaterTower Theatre
15650 Addison Road, Addison
(972) 450-6232
www.watertowertheatre.org

Got MILF?
3 Blonde Moms
Wednesday – Saturday, January 28 – 31
Warning: make sure to add the words “the play” when Googling 3 Blonde Moms or be prepared for a 2 Girls And A Cup-type experience which is totally different than this semi-scripted, PG-13 show about the wacky escapades of maternal bliss. Prepare for some mommy stories that will make June Cleaver blush.

Tickets: $35
Charles W. Eisemann Center
2351 Performance Drive, Richardson
(972) 744-4650
www.eisemanncenter.com

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