Whether you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth, or just a rubber nipple slipped over a bottle of Boone’s Farm, this week’s outings are sure to impress.
And as fate would have it, spooky Friday the 13th falls just before Valentine’s Day this year giving you the rare occasion to don that hockey mask two-nights running. Although, maybe you should jazz it up a little for the 14th with some press-on rhinestones or maybe some nice feather trim. Because nothing says “perfect online dating match” better than a bedazzled hockey mask, right?
Shot Thru The Heart
Friday, February 13, 7:00 p.m.
Kick off the holiday de amor with an evening of art, music and movement. Plus, your date will be so wooed by the free booze and sweets, he won’t realize you were actually too cheap to take him out for dinner or to buy him a box of chocolates.
807 Fletcher, Dallas
The Trials and Tribulations of a Trailer Trash Housewife
Opens Friday, February 13, 8:00 p.m.
Some call it fiction, but for others white trash tales of infidelity, poor grammar and appalling taste are just called childhood. Either way, you’re sure to enjoy this brand new Del Shores work celebrating the social microcosm that is the trailer park.
Tickets: $25 – $30
Uptown Players, KD Studio Theatre
2600 Stemmons Freeway, Dallas
Guerilla Gay Bar – Pretty In Pink February Takeover
Friday, February 13, 9:00 p.m.
We’re here, we’re queer and we’re ready to paint the town pink (or maybe just a lovely shade of fuchsia). Our BFF Guerilla Gay Bar is at it once again with another surprise gathering at an unsuspecting straight bar. According to the cryptic clues on the Web site, plan for multiple locations this go round. And don’t forget to wear your loveliest lavender hues.
Location: Announced today, check Web site for details
Luck Be A [Funny] Lady Tonight
Comedian Kate Clinton
Friday, February 13, 8:00 p.m.
It’s a fact, Kate Clinton can make us laugh until we pee. All the more reason to break out those canary yellow pants we’ve been hiding away all winter. We’ll be like a beam of sunshine in a see of flannel and denim.
Tickets: $20 -$50
1825 Abrams Parkway, Dallas
Meet the Flockers
Opens Friday, February 13, 8:00 p.m.
Texas Ballet Theater presents this ballet classic about the princess turned into the swan by an evil sorcerer’s curse. Sounds just like what happened to Ashley Simpson before the nose job. If that doesn’t lure you in, there will also be plenty of dance-belt wearing lords-a-leapin’.
Tickets: $19 – $99
1925 Elm Street, Dallas
The Bloom Bloom Room
Rose Room with special host Jason Dottley
Saturday, February 14, 11:00 p.m.
RuPaul’s Drag Race has rekindled our love of wig-wearing divas. So we were extra excited to learn that Jason Dottley from Sordid Lives would be hosting this week’s show at Rose Room. Personally, we would rather wear bacon boxer shorts in a room full of pit bulls before we would take to the stage with a room full of drag queens. But we wish him all the best, or at least a speedy recovery. Whichever.
Cost: No cover from 10:00 -10:30 p.m.; and $7 cover after 10:30 p.m.
Rose Room (inside S4)
3911 Cedar Springs Road, Dallas
You Had Me At Merlot
Lungarotti Wine Tasting
Wednesday, February 18, 5:30 – 7:30 p.m.
All the oneophiles in the house say “hooooo.” Okay, that was embarrassing. But we were trying to find a way to convey our passion about wine. Maybe passing out face down in your lawn, again, will yield the same result. Or, we could just stop by Cork to check out the release of the Lungarotti Pinot Grigio and Rubesco. Participants get 20 percent off any purchase, too.
Cost: Free, but reservations are required.
3636 McKinney Avenue, Dallas