Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Consumption Junction

Taking a page right out of the book of Shirley MacLaine, we’d like to be reincarnated as a Roman Emperor. Not only do we have legs to pull off a toga, we are totally sold on a life of gluttony filled with orgies, copious amounts of wine and, of course, a vomitorium! In the meantime, we’ll have to settle for cat fights on Rock of Love Bus instead of gladiator brawls with lions and regular wine tastings rather than hedonistic wine feasts, but we can make it work. Maybe we’ll break out a pair of sandals and a bed sheet to wear to one of this week’s events in preparation.

Wine-o-mite!
Rodney Strong Wine Tasting
Tonight, 6:00 – 8:00 p.m.
Chase away the Thursday-night blues with a nice glass of red. Cork is going from good to grape (we’ve got a million of ’em) with the Rodney Strong Wine Tasting. Enjoy eight wines, including reserve, and meet Rick Sayre, director of winemaking. Want an icebreaker for the crowd? Print up cards with your name and title: “Director of Whine Making.” That gets them every time!

Cost: $5 per person
Cork
3636 McKinney Avenue, Dallas
(214) 780-0373
www.corkwines.com

Sir Mix-a-lot
Cocktail Clinic with Steen Lilja
Friday, March 27, 5:00 – 11:00 p.m.
Okay, admit it. You know all the words to that “hey bartender, what’d you learn in school?” commercial. It’s okay. You’re among friends. We too have been busted singing about Sex On The Beach with Black Russians. But thanks to the Free Cocktail Clinic at Park Cities Prime Steakhouse, we can find out exactly what goes into a Bronx Cocktail or a Corpse Reviver without quitting our day job. And if the booze isn’t enough to lure you in, classes are led by Master Mixologist and certified dreamboat Sten Lilja.

Cost: Free
Park Cities Prime Steakhouse
8411 Preston Road, Dallas
(214) 691-7763
www.parkcitiesprime.com

Daddy’s Dyin’ (Who’s Got The Spiel?)
Del Shores: The Storyteller
Friday, March 27, 7:30 p.m.
You can’t handle the truth. Well, maybe you can. Dallas fave Del Shore dishes the real-life stories behind some of his hysterical plays and films like Sordid Lives and Daddy’s Dyin’ (Who’s Got The Will) in this unscripted one-man show. Sign us up for a night of fly-on-the-wall-fun.

Tickets: $25
KD Actors Studio
2600 North Stemmons Freeway, Dallas
(214) 630-5491
www.delshores.net/live

Vice, Vice Baby
Chocolate, Wine and Coffee Tasting
Saturday, March 28, 7:00 p.m.
Obviously the people at Hotel St. Germain know us too well. The only way they could make this event more appealing is to have it catered by scantily clad Puerto Rican go-go boys who actually stick a dollar in our underwear just for walking in the door. Nonetheless we will be there ready to sip, suck and taste all the goodness they have to offer.

Cost: $75 per person (reservations required)
Hotel St. Germain
2516 Maple Avenue, Dallas
(214) 871-2516
www.hotelstgermain.com

Goodnight Light
Earth Hour: Lights Out For The Environment’s Sake
Saturday, March 28, 8:30 – 9:30 p.m.
Don’t make us break out a photo of a crying polar bear to get your attention about global warming. Dallas is one of more than 1,500 cities and towns around the world that has committed to turning off their lights for one hour to conserve energy and raise awareness about the global climate change. The cleverest among you will use this as an opportunity to invite a date over for candlelit dinner only to have the candles get “accidentally” blown out leading to a rousing game of “Guess Whose Hands These Are?”. Smooth, huh.

www.earthhour.org

Similar, But DIFFArent
DIFFA/Dallas 20th Anniversary Collection: Utopia Preview Party
Tuesday, March 31, 6:30 – 8:30 p.m.
The Design Industries Foundation Fighting AIDS: DIFFA is back for another year of strutting about like a sequin-covered peacock. Be one of the first to get a sneak peek at this year’s coveted Jacket Collection that will be auctioned off at the May 2 event. Plus you get to nibble on cuisine compliments of Wolfgang Puck and sip on “Utopia” cocktails. Hmm, we had a “Utopia” cocktail once and woke up in a Greyhound bathroom in Juarez, but what are the odds of that happening twice?

Cost: $20 suggested donation
Union Station
400 South Houston Street, Dallas
(214) 748-8580
www.diffadallas.org

Penny Three Minutes For Your Thoughts
Dallas Voice’s Freedom of Speech Night
Tuesday, March 31, 8:00 – 9:30 p.m.
So, maybe you’ve been toying with the idea wearing nothing but gold body paint and feather boa while reading aloud the complete works of Sylvia Plath, but didn’t really have the right venue for such an act. Well now you do. The Dallas Voice’s Freedom of Speech Night is a monthly performance contest that gives contestants three minutes of uncensored to time to vent, to perform and to entertain. Weekly winners receive three minutes on the “Jack E Jett” show and a DVtv video of their award-winning performance. All performers receive bottomless cups of coffee. So get your tap shoes and your speech about interspecies NRA memberships ready.

Cost: appropriately enough, free
Buzzbrew’s Kitchen
4334 Lemmon Avenue, Dallas
(214) 460-2400
www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=831681389#/event.php?eid=60219372635&ref=mf

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