Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

(On All) Fours-Course Meal

Who doesn’t fantasize about eating off of chiseled Adonises?

Berlin-based ceramicist Hinrich Kroger understands that we gays like to lick hot muscle-gods clean, and has given us the gift of x-rated, but tasteful, ceramic dinnerware, now available online from the Leslie-Lohman Gallery.

We’d like to say that Kroger followed us around for a weekend conducting research for the ceramic bowls, cups, saucers, plates, vases and more, but unfortunately his most consistent imagery – a floor-based perspective looking up at the intricacies of a gang bang – has only occurred in our deepest fantasies.

Still, the other naughty acts the artist’s tribal-tattooed and healthily-endowed buff boys engage in are so relatable that we need to have the commemorative dishes, just like the ones we picked up at Disneyland, or on Babs’ final tour.

Sure, the artful ceramics might be a tad phallic-centric to break out when the boyfriend’s parents come for a visit, but for a night with the gay-gals, the collections are sure to inspire more than conversation.

The summer heat and nonstop Pride schedule has made our eating habit dwindle to a miniscule diet that’d make even Paris Hilton jealous, so we wouldn’t mind a little help in jumpstarting our appetite… and there’s nothing like gay bukake ceramic plates to make us hungry.

$90 and up