Despite Hallmarks’ greatest efforts, Halloween isn’t exactly a greeting card holiday. No thank you, cutesy; we prefer All Hallows’ Eve campy and full of frightening drag, just like San Francisco.
So when we heard card-makers Recycled Paper were teaming up with The Onion to test run a line of cards starting with one of our favorite holidays, we thought, “Finally, clever cards to send out to everyone on our Halloween-card list.”
Well, actually, we’ve never had a Halloween-card list, but thanks to this new greeting-card partnership, we can spread eerie-cheerie to those we still consider friends.
Speaking of redrawing our circle, our favorite non-Halloween greeting card from the first run of the venture reads like our lives, come every September: “List of Friends Revised After Birthday Party.”
We’ll have plenty of time to use the 200+ copies we purchased of the sassy birthday card next year – for now, we’re all about the offbeat Halloween holiday cards, including, “Mob Not Angry At Monster, Just Disappointed.”
If all goes well with the next few holidays, Recycled Paper and The Onion will be giving us more satirical headlines to scare the shit of our mailing list recipients with. Thankfully, the companies are off to a clever start.
After all, there’s more irreverence in these 10 cards than in Kanye West’s caps-lock key, making them ideal additions to our already over-the-top(-or-bottom) Halloween celebrations.
$12.50 for set of 10
Available at Target and select Walgreens and Meijers
Or online at store.theonion.com