Direction isn't our strong suit. Gucci is. Or, when times are lean, a three piece from Topman will do.
But when it comes to telling the direction, unless we're on our backs and you ask us to go down, we find it difficult to navigate.
The latest stylish watches from Diesel have our (upright) backs, though. This season's wrist-huggers from the edgy fashion house maintain the signature masculine/hip Diesel style, with a new addition: utility.
Lost your way on the dance floor of Winter Party and can't get your vision to straighten, err, gay-en enough to avoid the beach? Easy, breezy, girl! One of three faces on Diesel's latest offers up a handy compass to ensure you don't drunkenly stumble too far east into the waves like last year.
Wanna ensure that your tipsy sext message back to Central Time from the middle of the dance floor arrives before his boyfriend returns home? Simple, dimples! Face number two showcases an entirely different timezone.
In fact, there's so much going on with the useful watch we might not be able to concentrate during all those reach-arounds we plan to hand out as part of our charity work in 2010. (And by “reach around,” we're obviously referring to “reaching around” the napkin holder to grab cocktails at the bar.)
If the three main faces weren't enough Peter, Paul and Mary for you Marys, the traditional clock on Diesel's latest watch plays host to three faces itself: a second counter, minute counter and another dial with more numbers than Britney can probably count.
But as Miss Spears has generously taught us recently, the only numbers that matter are one, two, three, which the military-esque watch provides in enough doses to live in sin for the next decade…