Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Big Girl, You Are Beautiful

Oh, how we love Kirstie Alley. Ever since her debut on Cheers in 1989, we’ve crushed on her hard.

Sure, it was probably more of a she’d-make-a-great-BFF fantasy than something involving actual heterosexual shenanigans, but we loved her so much that we had all of our female suitors confused as to whether or not we were actually gay. (Mystery solved: we were, are, and always shall be. Amen.)

So, when we saw the preview for Kirstie Alley’s Big Life we were more excited than seeing American Idol’s Tim Urban shirtless for the first time.

We’ve loyally watched everything the gifted Kirstie has ever done (even the last, dreadful season of Veronica’s Closet) so you know our devotion is real.

And don’t even get us started on our infatuation with Drop Dead Gorgeous. Lines from that movie are part of our daily banter with everyone from the barista in the morning to the prison guard who tucks us in at night.

In Big Life, we get a glimpse into Kirstie’s larger-than-life reality of Hollywood privilege and the cost of fame, especially when she’s in a fat stage. Her daughter, Lillie, and son, True, provide plenty of moral support in her quest to lose the weight again and launch a new weight loss company.

Then there’s her ever-present handyman/chubby buddy, Jim, her assistant Kelly, and her assistant’s apprentice (yes, you read that correctly), the super-queeny Kyle, whose job is so cushy he takes naps during the day when he’s bored.

She’s also just the right amount of crazy to keep things interesting. With eight ringtail lemurs, birds, and at least two cats and one dog that we could count, she’s just an ark away from falling for some guy named Noah.

As with any reality show, some of the situations are obviously planned ahead for the sake of capturing funny moments to create a memorable episode, but it doesn’t matter because the actual interactions she has feel genuine and unscripted. Well, as much as they can be with a camera crew standing in your bedroom at 5:00 in the morning.

The first two episodes only left us wanting more and we sincerely hope she achieves her goals to lose the weight. Or that she simply decides to love herself for who she is, paparazzi be damned.

We’d like to end with a tribute to Kirstie and all the big girls everywhere, courtesy of MIKA. Click here for one of our favorite songs, Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)!

Now we’re off to the gym in her honor.

Kirstie Alley’s Big Life
Premieres Sunday, March 21 10/9C on A&E