Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Ladies & Gentlemen, The Brunch Variety Show!

If there was one single dish that perfectly represents the ideal brunch entrée, it’s Eggs Benedict. Brunch simply wouldn’t be brunch without it and we tend to not trust restaurants that don’t have it on their menus.

That said, we’re going to have to entrust Cowtown Diner in Fort Worth with our lives, and maybe even that man’s Brazilian wax we’ve been putting off. Because they have six, count ’em, six versions of Eggs Benedict and not one of them is traditional. And most shocking, they’re all delicious.

When we went there for dinner last month, we took one glance at the brunch menu and knew we’d be making a trek back to Cowtown. And boy howdy are we glad we did.

The first is Portabella Florentine, which is the least Benedicty (and our least favorite) so we’ll tell you about that one first. It’s a marinated mushroom filled with creamed spinach, then topped with poached eggs, feta cheese and some superb Tabasco tomatoes. Great if you’re a vegetarian or don’t want to go full decadence. But why?

Smoked Tenderloin Benedict, on the other hand, is delightfully indulgent. It’s got smoked sirloin, poached eggs and hollandaise, but instead of English muffins, everything is perched atop loaded potato cakes. This is steak-and-eggs on crack. Rubbed with Ecstasy. And sprinkled with parsley.

Venturing into its southern-charm territory, Cowtown presents Texas Chili Benedict and Steak Finger Benedict. The first is fried cornbread, Texas chili, eggs, cheddar cheese, fried onion strings and scallions. Yum, y’all. Then there’s biscuits, chicken fried steak fingers, sausage gravy and eggs on top of marinara sauce making up the second deep south variation. Yeah, these should be illegal they’re so good.

Short Rib Benedict on Texas Toast with hollandaise and those great Tabasco tomatoes? It’s like Granny’s pot roast, but for breakfast. By this point, we were finally starting to slow down. But we couldn’t stop yet, because the most unusual sounding of all the Benedicts was yet to come.

When we walked in, we told them that we were very skeptical about the Thanksgiving Benedict. It sounded like the one that they did just to be weird. Well, we were utterly wrong. The combination of roasted turkey, poached eggs and cranberry hollandaise on top of cornbread dressing may just be our favorite. Very strange, yet very delicious.

We ordered some versions with scrambled eggs, just for variety, and we highly recommend that if you’re not a poached egg fan.

Mimosas and Bloody Marys are just two bucks, but we should steer you toward the Mimosas. The Bloody Mary was the only thing the entire meal that we just didn’t like. Too much horseradish or something bitter turned us off. But that’s just a minor, minor hiccup in the grand scheme of the brunch greatness that is Cowtown Diner.

Take a group and order all the Benedicts. It’s a fun way to spend a couple of hours. And an interesting way to test out the strength of the elastic in your pants.

Brunch is served Saturday and Sunday only
305 Main Street, Fort Worth
(817) 332-9555