It’s summer, when a boy’s mind turns to hairlessness. Or less-hairness. Depends on whether you want to go completely bare or just cleaned up for Sunday Funday at the pool. After all, unless you’re a bear, most gays prefer a little less hair on their bodies than God gave them.
Count us among those who’ve cursed our slight hairiness since puberty. That’s when we realized that our mom’s Lillian Vernon catalog subscription also got her put on the International Male distribution list.
We’d sneak the catalog into our rooms and daydream about long vacations with our favorite underwear model. He was smooth, muscular and happy to make us Toaster Strudel when we awoke after a long night of video games, pillow fights and burping contests. (Hey, we were only twelve. We didn’t yet know what to do with that tingly feeling we got in our tummy when we cruised through that catalog.)
Over the years, we’ve held our own bodies to that International Male ideal of smoothness, but nothing ever worked. Nair stunk and it irritated our skin. Waxing and sugaring, well, they hurt like a Sandra Bernhard-level bitch and we swear we’ll never go through that torture EVER again.
So we had to settle for simple manscaping. We’ll never get rid of it all, but we can definitely get it under control. Three years ago, one of the very first products we ever reviewed on Gay List Daily was the then-new Philips Bodygroomer and it revolutionized our hair reduction routine. We could trim our chest, arms and palms with the trimming guards or remove them to completely shave our more delicate (dangly) appendages. Yes, it was designed to safely shave your Christmas ornaments to their pre-adolescent smoothness without fear of cuts to the delicate bits.
Well, Philips has gone and made the Bodygroomer better. Now, one side provides completely smooth trimming results (because sometimes you feel like a nut). The other side has a built-in, adjustable guard for everything else (because sometimes you don’t).
We’ve become addicted all over again. And thanks to our hairless parts, we’ve been inducted into the Rock ’n Roll Ball of Fame. Then we got listed in the Pennis Book of World Records. And just last month, we got a feature spread of our spread in Good Nadskeeping.
Typically, product updates are hardly revolutionary. But this one has consolidated everything we need into one handy tool with no loose parts to misplace. It’s also rechargeable and waterproof so you can sneak over the fence and groom yourself in your neighbor’s Jacuzzi for an hour without losing power – or clogging your own drain.
If we were Oprah (and we have been at least twice on Halloween), this would most definitely make our Favorite Things list. So do everyone a favor this Season of Swimsuits and do a little self-gardening. You’ll be glad you did.
Gay List Daily Prize Alert!
We’ve got a free Philips Norelco Bodygroom to give away to one lucky subscriber. Simply fill out our Contact Us form with your name, e-mail address and phone number so that we can contact the winner easily. Tell us why you should win a Philips Bodygroom and we’ll pick the best entry. Send us a photo of what you’re going to shave to firstname.lastname@example.org and increase your chances of winning us over!