Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

He Loves You, You Love Him

Barney Stinson, that is. Everybody’s favorite Gay Man Who Plays A Straight Sex Addict On TV has a brand new book. That’s right, Neil Patrick Harris’ How I Met Your Mother alter ego has “authored” a book, but we suspect Matt Kuhn had a lot to do with it since he’s the only real person who’s listed on the book’s cover.

If you don’t watch HIMYM, well, for starters you’re missing out on a pretty well-crafted sitcom. In it, Harris plays the sleazy playboy Barney Stinson, famous for his inventive ways of picking up women and getting them into bed. So as a brilliant cross-promotional tie-in we have been gifted The Playbook: Shut Up. Score Chicks. Be Awesome, a how-to guide filled with tips and tricks for straight men everywhere to get women to do the horizontal Hokey Pokey.

So why are we writing about a book geared to straight men? Two reasons. First, we just think it’s fantastic that Harris has done what many in Hollywood claim is impossible. He’s an openly gay man (and now a gay dad) who’s on one of the most popular shows portraying not just a heterosexual man, but one who loves, loves, loves women, sex and boobies. (We too love boobies, but just because they’re fun to jiggle.)

The second reason we chose this book is because some of the advice is just as sound for picking up gay men as it is straight women. Take “The Lifeguard” for instance. In this move, you simply identify a hot gay lifeguard (hell, who cares if he’s gay as long as he’s cute), get in the water and stop breathing. When the lifeguard saves your life and hopefully gives you mouth-to-mouth, a love connection could be imminent. But even if it isn’t, you’ve still kissed a hot guy and didn’t have to buy him dinner.

Every scenario has a projected success rate, the amount of prep time required to pull off the scheme, and what type of person it will attract. Of course, we really have no intention of trying the moves in here, but the book is a quick read and frequently laugh-out-loud funny. Plus, it has a picture of NPH on the cover. And that’s incentive enough for us to put this out on our coffee table.

It’s down right LEGEN…wait for it…wait for it…DARY!

How I Met Your Mother
Monday nights on CBS 8/7 central

The Playbook, $13