Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Booze To Go Just Got Classy(ish)

Despite the economic downturn, cocktail prices continue to skyrocket. Sometimes we feel like we can buy a three-bedroom condo in Detroit cheaper than a gin-and-tonic.

What’s a boy on a budget to do?

We’re pretty sure Social Security’s not going to be there for us when we retire, so we need our own government assistance program NOW: Happy Hour Security. For every drink you purchase, a percentage is banked for when you need it most – when you’re sober. We’ve earned enough credits by now to drink for free until 2047.

But because that’s not likely to pass through Congress anytime soon, sometimes we’ve got to be sneaky with our hooch.

Whether it’s the latest Meryl Sisters concert, the midnight IMAX screening of Justin Bieber’s 3-D horror flick, or another child beauty pageant featuring none other than our precocious five-year-old niece, all are occasions where we need a little liquid sanity.

That’s where flasks from Kaycee Binns come in. Featuring whimsical designs like “Wingman” or the slightly irreverent “Holy Water,” each features a small, but adequate, 6-ounce capacity perfect for spiking that $13 Coke or sneaking into a bathroom stall for a quick pick-me-up. They fit easily into a hip pocket, boot interior or love-handle fat fold for sneaking past security unnoticed.

Of course, we only fill ours with organic orange juice or Vanilla Ensure. Because you never know when you’re going to run into a senior citizen with low blood sugar. And we’re all about helping others.