Burp. Burp. Burp.
No, those aren’t the sounds of our aunt after too many Lu Ann Platters from Luby’s. They’re the glorious noises that come from Dixie Longate – or more specifically, her amazing line of Tupperware products.
If you’re gay, then by now you should know who Dixie Longate is. She’s the funniest, sexiest, white-trashiest Tupperware lady in all the land. And she means business. A whole lot of innovative food-storage business, that is.
Hawking Tupperware has not only made her famous around the world, but far wealthier than gay-hating Donald Trump (we wish). Well, at least she has better hair.
Dixie’s Tupperware Party is a one-woman show opening tomorrow night at Bass Hall in Fort Worth and it’s well worth the drive for all you Dallas folk. And for all our Cowtown friends, you should already be camped outside the stage door awaiting the arrival of the Goddess of Plastic Crap.
Her show is constantly updated with the latest gadgets and gewgaws from Tupperware, so even if you’ve seen Dixie Longate before, you ain’t seen Dixie Longate lately. Us, we like seeing Dixie Longate every single day.
During the evening, she will demonstrate dozens of real Tupperware products and even sell them to you after the show. After all, that’s how she twice became the top seller in the nation. Just make sure you don’t leave without our personal favorite product of all-time: the Pick-a-Deli Container. No more fingers that smell like pickles! (unless you’re Todd Palin, then we’re afraid that’s a permanent disorder.)
She’ll show you how to incorporate Tupperware products for bedroom use and all sorts of other ways that are surely making inventor Earl Silas Tupper spin in his re-sealable casket. But it’s Dixie’s irreverence that will not just have you howling with laughter, but spreading open your wallet, too.
Tickets: $22 – $38.50
March 9 – 13, 2011
525 Commerce Street, Fort Worth
Gay List Giveaway
Win! Win! Win! The most coveted seats in the house are on-stage with Dixie, where you can participate in the party all up-close and personal-like. And because we’re fabulous and love our even more fabulous readers, we have a pair of these great seats to give away to tomorrow’s SOLD OUT performance. But you better hurry because this time, the early bird gets the tickets. Just know that if you sit on stage, you WILL likely participate in the show, which is cool because that often means FREE stuff. And it’s a helluva lot of fun, too.
All entries must be received by Noon TODAY, Tuesday, March 8, 2011 (hence our early-bird designation), so get to enterin’! You MUST register via our Contact Us page and ONLY the Contact Us page, which is RIGHT HERE. Give us your name, e-mail address, and enter your phone number in the comments section so we can quickly get in touch with you. Good luck!
Note: Winner must agree in writing to some simple terms and conditions to be able to sit on-stage with the superstar.