If you love something, set it free. If it doesn’t come back, it probably got hit by a train.
Conversely, if it had a Bushnell BackTrack Point-5, it would’ve easily found its way back to safety. And your loving arms where you would likely refer to it as a he or she, not something so impersonal.
Of course, you may benefit from a BackTrack Point-5, too. The simplest-to-use GPS device we’ve ever seen makes it easy to find your way from back from Point B to Point A. It’s great for travel, so if you wander off on foot from your hotel, you won’t have to worry about getting sold into the sex trade for making a wrong turn on your way back from a late night on the town.
Just think how many Lifetime Original Movies could have been avoided had the protagonist found her way home safely.
BackTrack Point 5 is also good for finding your car in a gigantic parking lot. Like at Dollywood. The Ice Capades. Or someplace equally butch and manly.
The small size makes it easy to stick in your pocket or attach to a belt loop. Or Prince Albert piercing.
We promise, with this handy gadget on your side, you’ll never get lost again. Unless you’re hiding from the IRS because of ten years’ unpaid taxes and a warrant for your arrest from running an illegal pornographic poultry web site.
Hypothetically speaking, of course.