Nothing reminds us that it’s summer more effectively than the sun burning a hole in our retinas when we walk outside. It’s nature’s way of saying, “You need two eye patches, matey.” But walking around with double pirate patchage is not the best way to solve the harsh glare of the sun.
Instead, we like to accessorize with kick-ass sunglasses. We have a pair that matches our Sunday Seersucker Goin’-to-Church ensemble. Another for our head-to-toe Latex jumper for visits to the Tea Party-sponsored gay bathhouses. And other pairs just for everyday activities like planking on the service counter at McDonald’s.
Yes, we love our shades. It makes our future bright, you know. But we’ve found a new line of sunglasses that may replace every other pair we own. They’re called Starck Eyes from Philippe Starck through a collaboration with Alain Mikli – and they love to be abused. Just like our pool-boy concubine.
The arms on our frames are the best part. The biolink hinge, inspired by the human clavicle (don’t worry, it’s not as dirty as it sounds), allows the arms to move up and down and side to side. Less chance of breaking when we’re taking pictures of our pet gorilla wearing them.
Even the glasses case is cool, like something from outer space sent to hold one of our most valuable possessions.
So avoid the retina fry of summer and the harsh stare of people offended by your out-of-style, free sunglasses from a tequila company and get something that makes a real statement. And ends with an exclamation point.
Most sunglasses around $395
For a store near you, visit www.mikli.com
