Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Four Holes In One

The last time we golfed, we were knocking our balls into a clown’s mouth. And things were even less sophisticated once we got onto the putt-putt course itself. Windmills and dinosaurs? Seriously? They never existed together.

But we know there are people who love to go out and bogey their wood while stroking their mulligan. Supposedly, it’s how business deals are done among the country-club set. What we’ve never understood is why the golf costumes are usually so ugly. Rich people are playing the sport, so why do they dress like the carnival just rolled into town and they’ve gotta soft-shoe for their lives to win the grand-prize of two front teeth?

Well, finally, there’s a brand of golf apparel that we can totally endorse without anxiety. Hell, we even wore one of their awesome, color-blocked shirts as a test and got several compliments from gays and women alike. When we told our admirers it was a golf shirt, you’d think we’d switched their Starbucks with instant Folger’s crystals. The look of shock was that dramatic.

Sub70 shirts are designed with a European slim-fit style, so order up a size (or two) from your normal Fat American size. The shirts are made of a high-performance polyester that wicks away moisture and allows superior breathability, which makes them great for actual sporting activity, or just wandering around the humid New Orleans French Quarter during Southern Decadence. (Without pants, of course.)

One look at their line of shirts and we think you’ll agree: these are the best-looking golf shirts ever.

Now let’s see what they can do for bowling.

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