Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Judgin' Judys

We try hard not to review too many novelty items because funny as some of them are, the joke’s pretty much over by the time you get to the end of the story. However, we’ve found a hand-held adult toy that uses batteries, makes some men feel completely inadequate and livens up any party.

Introducing the Gaydar Gun.

Inspired by a hit short film called Gaydar, this is the closest thing to true gaydar this side of strapping Kathy Griffin to the roof of your car and having her point out the homos on the street.

It’s easy to use, too.

Simply set the Gaydar Gun to male or female, point at a person of that sex, and pull the trigger. Immediately, the Homometer dial slides somewhere between 0% (completely hetero) to 100% (fuh-lamingly gay). Along with that, the voice of a majorly sassy queen spouts out the results.

In our own scientific study, we invited three hot men to the Gay List Mansion and had them strip naked so nothing interfered with the high-tech gamma rays of the Gaydar Gun. Here are the results.

“You rarely dot your “i” with a heart.” Sorry, this guy’s as straight as they come.

“Your saloon door swings both ways.” Pour enough drinks down this guy’s throat and a midnight back-alley rendezvous is entirely possible.

“Eating fruitcake would be cannibalism.” Call up the bathhouse and reserve your usual locker.

It’s so fun we’ve even built an entire Halloween costume around it. We’ve ordered the “Sexy Cop” and plan to use the Gaydar Gun as a conversation starter with every cute guy we see. If they don’t like the results, we’re fully prepared to prove the device wrong.

It’s just like the Scientology E-meter. Only far less expensive to play with.