Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Candleless In The Wind

Tell us if this sounds familiar.

You cook a gourmet dinner, set a romantic table al fresco, and prepare to end the date in a horizontal position thanks to perfect music, great conversation and the wine-me-dine-me-69-me ambience that can only come from candlelight.

But then a northerly breeze blows in. Rather than simply snuffing out the mesmerizing flickers of light, a spark lands in your man’s perfectly coiffed fauxhawk and faster than you can scream, “L’Oreal Hair & Makeup Room!” he’s in flames and you’re quickly formulating an alibi.

It’s happened to us a million times. (OK, 17, but we like to exaggerate for effect.)

So, we’ve eliminated candles from our mating repertoire. But that leaves such a void in the ambience. Until now.

We’ve got a secret weapon that previously was only available to the most exclusive restaurants and hotels of the world.

It’s called Neoz Cordless Lighting. Available in a variety of stunning designs and colors, each cordless light is a marvel of engineering.

The lamps are rechargeable, dimmable, safe (thankfully), and illuminate with 20 times the brightness of a candle. They use Lithium-ion rechargeable batteries so they can last for 260 hours on a single charge (and none of our dates last even nearly that long).

The designs are stunning and even though they’re not inexpensive, they’re an ideal addition to any well-appointed home.

After all, according to several courts of law in three different countries, you can put a price on a human life. And it’s considerably more than a cordless lamp.

Starting at $329

Holiday Sale – 10% discount, applied at checkout. Enter coupon code “Holiday Sale”. Applies only to NEOZ Cordless Lighting. Expires December 24, 2011.