Drink your dessert, Shelby. Chewing your calories is sooooo 2009.
Luckily, there are some truly decadent flavored vodkas that will satisfy all your sugary cravings and sweeten up any holiday gathering. Except, of course, those involving lawyers, cops and department store security guards making accusations of shoplifting $3,200 worth of low-rise briefs and scented candles. (Trust us, even though it requires a cavity search, they always find our flask before we enter the courtroom.)
But in any other situation, you simply must serve up the gayest vodkas we’ve ever tasted. Desirée Vodkas are distilled by a company with gay ownership, so you know right there that these guys understand the importance of well crafted liquor.
The flavor list reads like a dessert menu with flavors that include Brownie Batter, Cake, Red Velvet Cake and Crème Brûlée. There’s even a flavor called Straight.
Coincidentally, enough Straight Vodka can thrust even the most hetero guy onto our team for the night.
When the lights are off, he’s not going to care who’s licking vodka off his body. Besides, everyone knows brownie batter’s always better with nuts.
$24.99 – $28.99 average retail per 750ml
Available in select markets