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The 701 Club: Solange Knowles, Christmas Rush & Elections

 

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Solange Knowles: I’ve been in prayer regarding the recent nuptials of Solange Knowles in the decadent city of New Orleans. This child of God was married at the age of 19, already has a child, was divorced, and has now remarried to another man. To say nothing of the “laying on of hands” which she displayed with Reverend Jay-Z in an elevator. All of this, and Sister Solange has EVERYONE in the wedding, including herself, wearing WHITE. Tsk tsk tsk. First of all, it is clear to me that “Solange” is a little known Swahili word which, loosely translated, means “Angry Sibling of Much Bigger Star,” and secondly, isn’t it a blessing that she married a man? Otherwise she would be RUINING the institution of marriage. Preach!

Christmas Rush: I supposed I, in my deep-seated faith, should rejoice at the RUSH to celebrate the impending birthday of our Lord Jesus Christ by retailers and radio stations. However, if I don’t temper myself, by the time December 25 finally DOES roll around, I will be ready to nail Christmas to a cross. And we don’t do THAT until April. Lord help.

Elections: Let us pause to reflect on the recent midterm elections.  The Repugnantcans now have the majority of power across this country. Their God-fearing patriotism has them continuing to wage a battle against the Demoncratic policies which they claim they’ve been unable to win. Now let us see if this new found power will grant their desires. OR, as I suspect, they will be revealed to be merely Pharisees opining in the temple of greed. Reflect on this…in Jesus’ time, it was a woman who birthed the Savior, it was a woman who washed his feet,  and it was a woman to whom he was first revealed after Resurrection. May it be a woman then who dethrones these Pharisees in 2016. And may her initials be Hallelujah Christians!

Sister Helen Holy of the First Southern Fried, Self-Satisfied Baptist Church is the arbiter of all that’s good and Christian in this world. When not ministering to heathens at events on dry land nationwide, she can frequently be found taking her ministry to the high seas on RSVP Cruises, where she spends most of the week on her knees “in prayer.” Be sure to follow Sister Helen Holy on Facebook at www.facebook.com/helen.holy.

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