Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

The 701 Club: Gulag, Gas & Gabor

Helen Holy - 625x625 (2)The world is spinning out of control, with Russia and Hungary making the news. Heed these thoughts.

Gulag: If Russia technoviks did indeed hack into our election process, then the love affair between Donnie and Vladimir appears to intensifying. And if THAT is the case, I’m not having new stationery printed until I feel certain that the home city of my ministry isn’t going to be turned into a work camp and renamed Dallashevik. To that, I say NYET!

Gas: I try not to get too involved in politics, but some news just hits too close to home. On my way to church, I have to drive by the headquarters of ExxonMobil, or, as I prefer to call it, the Death Star. I know that Brother Rex Tillerson, CEO of ExxonMobil makes more money than King Solomon, but I have YET to see proof of him tithing to ANY religious organization. Now come the news that Brother Trump has anointed him as Secretary of State. An oil baron negotiating peace and other treaties with Vladdy Putin and assorted Sheiks. Brothers and Sisters, this nation is about to take a big dose of Bean-O, thus ridding our land of excess gas. Praise Tesla!

Gabor: Brothers and Sisters, we’ve lost another ego. Zsa Zsa Gabor has left this world. Before the Armenian Kardashians, there were the Hungarian Gabors – Zsa Zsa, Eva and Magda. While these sisters were famous for indeterminate reasons, they were married a total of TWENTY TIMES, between the three of them. Each were “actresses” and “socialites,” but only Eva was welcomed into American homes on a regular basis via GREEN ACRES.  Wholesome entertainment. Yet, Zsa Zsa merely remained famous for always being in the news. Marrying. Slapping. Suing. Divorcing. And yet she lived to be almost 100 years old. Proving that there are some people that even the Lord doesn’t want to call home until He just has to. Ciao, Dahlink!