Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Rubber? We Hardly Know Her!

It’s hard to believe that in 2020 people are still embarrassed to purchase condoms. Especially anyone requiring extra-large ones. We’d demand a price check at CVS every time we went to the register if that were the case.

But we digress.

Some people are still shy about their prophylactic purchases, while others simply don’t want to pay for them. Whichever camp you fall into, you’re covered (and so’s your peckeroo) with the free Nice Package service from Prism Health North Texas.

If you live in Dallas, Denton, Collin, Ellis, Henderson, Hunt, Kaufman, Rockwall, Cooke, Fannin, Grayson or Navarro Counties, all you have to do is sign up at freenicepackage.com and select one of four different packages, including one that’s latex-free and one that’s loaded with giant schlong sheaths.

We ordered ours and received them about a week later (some shipping times will be faster depending on how much further the White House destroys the postal service) and they came in a bright, shiny gold shipping envelope. Not sure if that’s the truest definition of “discreet shipping” but it didn’t say “Loaded with Sex Stuff” either.

It’s been a sexual dry spell since lockdowns started in March, so we couldn’t wait to try out our new condoms and lubes. We were really sad when the first one fell right off, but once we realized it was a female condom we felt quite relieved.

Best of all, our nightstand drawer now contains enough condoms to last us for the next year or more. (Is it equally sad that the package only contained 12?)

Nice Package
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