Let us give thanks for these prayer requests.
Corruption. I was alarmed to see a headline announcing that people over the age of 45 are at a greater risk of sexually transmitted infections. What does this corruption say about our society? Every fine Christian knows that no one has sex at that age. Apparently it is the unwashed and immoral who are being afflicted. Of course, this study was conducted in three European countries and we all know there are no Christians over there except for, maybe, Catholics. Apparently, people at that age think they are invincible or are too ashamed to seek help. Let me go against the grain for a moment and say that this is a place where I think we should all turn to the sodomites for advice. Lord knows that the gays have had their share of sexually transmitted infections. But they have risen above the shame, fear and loathing and not only sought help but have helped create treatments for these afflictions. These middle-aged European sluts need to take a lesson. Amen?
Cabinets. The news is rife with reports of the people that Brother Joe Biden is choosing to help build his cabinets. I realize that Brother Biden will have an important position in this world, but I don’t see what the fuss is about the qualifications of people who are going to work on the White House kitchen. And why just his cabinet? Who will he choose for his countertops? And will he take them for granite? (I couldn’t resist.) I don’t think I’ll ever understand politics. I just hope that Sister Melania gets all her china and crystal out first.
Communing. Listen up, Sinners, I expect every one of you to be on your knees in an attitude of Thanksgiving this week. Not only do we observe the national day of such activity on Thursday, but we each need to try harder to find thankfulness in the midst of what we have experienced this year. While I highly suggest that there be a healthy amount of plexiglass between you and your fellow gluttons as you commune and feast, let us remain steadfast in our efforts to maintain our health amidst the threat of the Crayola virus. Who’s going to offer grace?