Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Sports, Sports & Shots.

I’m feeling athletic this week.

Sports.  I hate sports.  It’s just not a subject which usually interests me.  However, this week, I must turn my prayers in such direction.  I don’t understand all of what’s going on, but college football in my neck of the woods is in an uproar.  Apparently, the University of Texas and University of Oklahoma are leaving something called the “Big 12”, and it’s quite the story.  Personally, I thought the “Big 12” were the disciples, but whatever.  It seems that college sports is not just a reason to scream and shout at people, but rather a serious money-making venture.  By making this move, these two secular schools are causing financial disaster for three other institutions of higher learning in Texas.  Texas Tech, Texas Christian University and, most importantly to me, Baylor University.  Stealing from others to advance your own continued wealth.  I had no idea that college sports were so Republican.

Sports.  Of course, the real “big” news in sports right now is the Olympic Games in Tokyo.  I have so many burdens about this folderol.  First, I am continually confused about the “2020 Olympics” happening in 2021.  Somebody’s losing a job over that.  Secondly, the American darling seems to be gymnast Simone Biles.  Listen, I’d change my last name.  That one just leaves a bad taste in the mouth.  Next, some of these new sports categories give me pause.  Olympic Skateboarding??  This is an activity which I associate with teen hoodlums and drug dealers.  Lord!  Finally, I will continue my work of inspection, ensuring that there is no suggestive attire at all men’s diving, swimming and gymnastics events.  It’s a ministry which brings sweat to my brow.

Shots.  I’m so relieve to see so many pro sports team owners requiring their players to be vaccinated against the Crayola virus.  I support this strongly although I’m not normally an athletic supporter.  Those players who do not do so are subjected to fines of $15000 per day.  Alas, this is the equivalent of fining you and me $.15 per day, but I digress.  It is my prayer that all people are led to be inoculated from this dread disease.  Knowing the number of faithful who feel that the Lord will protect them in a mightier way than medically researched shots, I beseech these souls to have faith that it is the Lord Himself who is providing this vaccinated protection.  Beyond this simple prayer, I just have to believe that those who yet abstain are just idiots.  Let us pray.