Hearken ye to my words of wisdom and comfort.
Comet. Sometimes, obituaries of note are more obscure than others, resonating only with those of us in our elder years. This week brought us one such passing. Sister Jane Withers left this mortal coil at the age of 95. She had been a contemporary of Sister Shirley Temple as a child actress, often playing the less delicate flower. As we all know, being a child performer can lead to a troubled adulthood. However, Sisters Temple and Withers never suffered such misfortune. While Sister Temple went on to become a US Ambassador to Ghana, Sister Withers experienced fame and fortune as a beloved presence in television commercials of the 1970s. True to the “less delicate flower” reputation earned as a child, Sister Jane became known to America as Josephine the Plumber in years of commercials for Comet Cleanser. In short, Shirley ascended to the Temples of government while Jane Withered to a blue collar woman with a plunger and enough powdered cleanser to clean up all the way to the bank. Well done, little girls.
Cosmos. For heaven’s sake……….literally. A Canadian company has just announced that it “plans to blast a satellite into space aboard a SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket that will allow advertising to be beamed from Earth and displayed on a pixelated screen on the side of the spacecraft.” Who are we selling to……Marvin the Martian?? It seems that the “space billboard” will be viewed with an external camera so that one’s advertisement can be seen with the Earth in the background. Good Lord. The last thing I need to see is another marketing tool for me to be reminded that somebody has “the best extended car warranty on the Earth!”
Cuomo. It was a matter of time. After the New York State Attorney General, Sister Letitia James, announced credible evidence of 11 cases of sexual harassment perpetrated by Governor Andrew Cuomo, I’ve been watching for news of governmental change in the Empire State. Shame on Brother Andrew for his indiscretions, but I applaud his willingness to step aside in light of his recent protestations against such a move. I have two comments here. First, Brother AC’s resignation fittingly puts two women in the top posts of state government in New York. Second, what about that other lothario who the New York State Attorney General has been investigating? May the Lord hasten judgment.