Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Looks, Lindsey & Less

Does anyone ever read this opening line?

Looks.  In the midst of this horrible conflict in the Ukraine, I am positively appalled that people are objectifying Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky.  The man is standing tall on behalf of his people in the face of a formidable foe.  How is it POSSIBLY important that we care whether a leader is attractive or ugly?  Do we treat them differently?  Disgusting.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go tend to my Justin Trudeau laptop screensaver and change the roll of my Putin toilet paper.

Lindsey.  Speaking of Putin, many ideas are floating around as to how to best handle this despot.  The latest and most shocking suggestion has recently come from Brother Lindsey Graham.  In his Tweeter account, he posted this statement about Putin, “The only way this ends is for somebody in Russia to take this guy out.”  Pundits and politicians are scrambling to decry this apparent suggestion for assassination.  People, calm down.  This was not the intent at all.  Lindsey was merely suggesting the one think that always calms him down but is a rare occurrence………Someone taking Lindsey out on a date.  Putin just needs a nice dinner and maybe a rubdown.  Works for Lindsey!

Less.  And speaking of toilet paper, this story caught my eye.  “Your toilet paper roll is slimming down.”  Of course I had to read.  Apparently, in this time of inflation, manufacturers are cutting costs by reducing amount of product in packaging.  According to this article, “Charmin’s ultra-soft toilet paper 18-count mega package now contains 244 two-ply sheets, down from a previous 264 double-ply sheets per roll.  And super mega rolls of the brand now display 366 sheets versus a previous 396 sheets per roll.”  Let us reflect.  SOMEONE had to take the time to count those small sheets in a roll.  How dull does your life have to be…………………?