Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

American Crime Stories

It had to happen, happen sometime.  After six previous hearings, this week’s episode of Insurrection:  American Crime Story left something to be desired.  Sure, there were more dots connected, providing more disturbing evidence of Trump’s efforts to overturn the 2020 presidential election results and his role in setting in motion the violent attack on the U. S. Capitol on January 6 of last year.  

What I got fixated on is less a dot and more an ink blob.  The unscheduled December 18 White House meeting of the competing legal teams working for Trump devolved into an “unhinged” clash between what has been described as Team Normal and Team Crazy.  But these terms do not accurately describe the folks involved.

We must reach to the wisdom of George Carlin for more accuracy.  Instead of Team Normal, perhaps we should use Team FOS, which is like POS, except “full” replaces “piece.”  A review of former White house Counsel Pat Cipollone’s  defense of Trump in the first impeachment trial shows exactly why he is well positioned as leader of Team FOS.

As for the other side, Carlin might have named them Team FN-NUTS, a rather concise, yet suggestive, way of describing the likes of Sidney Powell and Rudy Giuliani.  Add in Michael Flynn, who is only an honorary member of FN-NUTS as he isn’t a lawyer, and we have a scene ready to go from Carlinesque to Kafkaesque in a heartbeat.

According to Derek Lyons, a former White House staff secretary, the players were  “shouting at each other, hurling insults at each other.”  There were heated words testified to about the lack of evidence, corrupt judges, Venezuela, and nest thermostats, sure, but there’s not a hurled insult in all of that.

Rudy Giuliani, who always keeps it classy, admitted to calling Team FOS “a bunch of p******,” but that’s not an insult—for a variety of reasons—and at best could be called name calling at a decidedly fifth grade level.  I want to know the real insults.

Did anyone say something that started with “Your legal analysis goes about as deep as your…”?  Or “your theory of the case would go down in court faster than you would at…”  You know, insults.

But, alas, we have no tape, so we’ll probably never know the juicier affronts that may have bounced off the walls of the White House.  But when this whole thing actually becomes Insurrection:  American Crime Story, some scriptwriter is going to have a field day coming up with the dialogue.  

There was other tape that emerged this week concerning the massacre of school children and teachers in Uvalde.  That revelation also left me quite frustrated on several different levels as well.  

As I’ve seen the footage presented in various ways, the narrative moves from what happened in the classroom—where the actual murders took place—to the outside hallway.  While this change in focus may be necessary to address the failure of the law enforcement on the scene to protect and serve those inside the classroom, the muting of the tape diminishes what would be a more powerful presentation if it were not silenced.

The best I’ve seen includes a voiceover that provides detail about when 911 calls were made from inside the classroom, when the killer is firing shots, and when the screaming can be heard.  I suppose those who make these decisions think it’s just too disturbing to air, but then there’s that part of me that bristles that the sound is muted to protect us.  Who’s being protected anyway?  It’s too late to protect the murdered, the survivors, and all the families to which they belonged.  

I can see the law enforcement officers being protected in a way by masking the brutality of what was going on while they were doing nothing in the hallway, but surely they don’t deserve such protection.  So is it just the public being saved from something disturbing that we should stay somewhat removed from?

It’s too late for that, too, isn’t it?  We know going to church, the movies, the grocery store, even a Fourth of July parade has added risk.  Last week, I was having lunch with a dear friend when a very loud, unknown sound filled the restaurant, and I and everyone within my range of sight physically bolted into an instinctive position preparing to flee.  If we’re already this jumpy, it’s practically precious to think someone is trying to protect us.

There will never be Uvalde:  American Crime Story.  It would be too disturbing.  If we got disturbed and stayed disturbed, we might force something to actually get done.  And maybe, just maybe, that is what is disturbing to them.