Put Some Gay In Your Day, Dallas!

Bless Her Heart

The recent Facebook post from a Michigan hair salon owner announcing, in a manner of speaking, that anyone who “identifies as anything other than a man/woman please seek services at a pet groomer” was bound to hit my radar.  

The woman, whose name I will not mention, clarified to a local news outlet that she has no issues with the LGB part.  “It’s the TQ+ that I’m not going to support.”  And by support, she means service in her salon in this context.

So I’m going to let my G part fly, because the clear ignorance of this woman deserves nothing less.  Besides, my bitchy queen needs to be taken out for a walk, just like the other pets.

First off, in many cases, trans men and trans women do identify as “a man/woman” so I’m not sure you understand that you failed to exclude them in your post, which I believe was your intent.  Now, based on the picture of you in the New York Post (oh, yeah, it’s about to get personal), I’ve seen better highlight jobs on curly bobs like the one you’re sporting come out of a box at the Walgreens.  So who needs a bottle job from your salon anyway?  

We can only hope that your salon doesn’t offer makeup services.  It is clear that your foundation is about five shades lighter than your neck and decolletage.  We all struggle with this, but for God’s sake, girl, blend like your life depends on it.

Now move over, bitchy queen, and let the inner English teacher have a go at her.  Those introductory clauses, both of them, need a comma after them.  Tuck that period inside the quote when you’re trying to be a smartass and use “hey you” as a pronoun.  We love a compound sentence; it’s so lovely when the semi-colon gets a chance to shine.  But one needs two complete sentences to make it compound, not one sentence and a sentence fragment.  “This is America; free speech.”  Your sentence is as incomplete as your thinking.  

But clearly the most troubling business about not supporting the TQ+ part.  And that hateful woman in Michigan isn’t the only one.

It seems to me that trans people are targeted by so many attacks these days as T is thought to be more vulnerable than L, G and B by those doing the attacking.  Divide and conquer has long been an effective strategy employed by the military, politicians and even in the average neighborhood owners’ association.  Support of the TQ+ part by the LGB shouldn’t only be about self-defense.  That is the slippery slope rationale, and with all due respect to the Slip ‘N Slide, that just isn’t enough.

The thing is that simple + means so much more than representing those who are intersex, asexual or pansexual, among others.  It sort of represents another box, a sort of anticipatory acknowledgment of differences unknown or undefined currently.  I fully understand that last sentence is a bit scary, but then it was only a few years ago that I realized that the attractiveness of a strapless heart-shaped neckline on a cocktail dress depends, not on the gender of the person wearing it, but on the body being put into it.  Let’s face it—there’s someone for every body.

This acronym keeps getting changed and stretched out to LGBTQIA+ to include everyone dealing with issues of sexual orientation, gender identity and what might simply be called personal presentation.  The day may come when we add an X, Y or Z, but the one letter that I don’t think will ever be added is S.

Before Stonewall started this avalanche of initials, the patriarchy of Straight people was already having problems keeping women and men in their places.  Betty Friedan and The Feminine Mystique did not emerge in the woke world of 1963.  Muhammed Ali refused to be drafted in 1967, along with a whole bunch of other young men who declined to be fodder for the war machine.  They were just two of the many who led and encouraged a burgeoning movement, long before there was a rainbow flag and an awkward acronym, that tapped into resistance by those who were challenging gender norms in one way or another.  Lord knows, this new generation is taking it to a whole new level.

I could be wrong, but that woman in that small town in Michigan upset with the TQ+ part is probably just as bothered by the boys wearing earrings and nail polish, and the girls who don’t wear makeup or get their hair done.  Her town passed a referendum in 2011 by a two-to-one margin to protect the whole LGBTQIA+ community.  

Her misguided announcement might very well alienate more than just those she would choose to carve out, and her outdated thinking might make her salon space available for another use.  Personally, I suspect a tattoo parlor there would be karma at its finest.

Bless her heart.