Put Some Gay In Your Day!

The 701 Club

Sister Helen Holy of the First Southern Fried, Self-Satisfied Baptist Church, the arbiter of all that is moral and chaste, shares her perspective on current events. When not ministering to heathens at events on dry land nationwide, she can frequently be found taking her ministry to the high seas on RSVP Cruises, where she spends most of the week on her knees “in prayer.” Why 701? Well, because she’s just a little bit better than that other Christian newscast.

Suffering, Suffragettes, & Suffice

My heart is heavy this week. Suffering.  I am never remiss in my condemnation of Hollyweird awards shows.  However, after the portion of the Grammys which I suffered through Sunday […]

Bowl, Body & Burger

I have dedicated my prayer life this week to Sunday’s football extravaganza. Bowl.  Lord, forgive the hatred in my heart, but I have very strong feelings about the New England […]

Gowns, Gays & Guts

It’s a slow news week, but I’m never at a loss for commentary! Gowns.  Another round of Hollywood self-indulgence has left its mess on the boob tube.  Last Sunday’s SAG […]

Bowls, Balls & Butts

I’m exhausted this week from prayer over these stories.  Let us reflect. Bowls.  I don’t really care much for football, nor do I stay abreast of the ins and outs […]

Tribute, Truckload & Traffic

We start with praise and end with condemnation.  Tribute. Let us turn our thoughts to Glory where there is surely a grand staircase today descending to the Pearly Gates, as Sister […]

Glory, Globes & Gloom

Another year, another start, another set of stories.  Bow your heads. Glory.  Let us grieve as one, Brothers and Sisters.  A man of great business stature has passed away.  Brother […]

Resolutions, Records & Repulsive

The New Year is off to a disgusting start. Now, more than ever, we need to be on our knees! Resolutions. We have survived another year and, more importantly, another New […]

Communication, Catholics & Cars

Some pre-Christmas opinions and prayer requests. Communication.  At this time of year, many end-of-year lists emerge.  I’d like to draw your attention to the most popular words of 2018, according […]

Pounds, Perversity & Pyramid.

Let us turn our prayer wagons to foreign missions. Pounds.  News out of the United Kingdom (please…..the Kingdom of God is the ONLY Kingdom!) is that the planned exit from […]

Remember, Recoil & Rest

It’s time for this week’s reflection. Remember. Let us reflect upon the loss of the 41st President of our country. After the leadership we have experienced the last two years, it […]